I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
