i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize