Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
