it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
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