so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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