I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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