So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
sick fucks of a feather flock together
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
