i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
third nipple confirmed
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
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