Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
