I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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