Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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