Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
