I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
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