Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
