I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
