Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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