I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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