Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize
