Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
You ate ashes out of my bong
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
