My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
