Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
