Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
