So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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