It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
