butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
