We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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