why didn't you poke me back
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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