she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
