I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize