she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
my poor anus
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
