You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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