You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
tonight lets celebrate not being married
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
