i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
