my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
