That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
