I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
