wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
