chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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