I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
