also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I'm just crazy horny about you
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
