So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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