Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
