She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
