Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Sext me about skeletons
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
