I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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