I'm gonna have a badass scar
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
