Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
