help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I think I died a long time ago.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
