just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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