I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
