We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize