Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Randomize