is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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